Calling All Adventurers: S1 E3 - Some Kind Of Monster

S1 Episode 3: Some Kind of Monster

Intro & News

Calling all adventurers, I repeat, Calling All Adventurers.

Starting off with an update from last week. Those adventurers who had burned down a building in Blacksnow, have now been found. According to them, they had to leave abruptly and chase their target to a derelict fort a few miles outside of town. Another party have escorted them back and the issue has been cleared up with the guards.

In other news, despite a 46% increase in assassinations in Firon, Viscount Caleb Marran claims that there is no evidence to support that Cardinal, an alleged fraternity of assassins, is present in his city-state. He further asserts that Cardinal is exclusively the name of a noble and trustworthy bird and to stop looking any further into it.

Right, there's no active requests at this point. Shall we continue with the story? Yes, I think we shall. 

Story Start

About two days had passed since I left Greywall for Maidenstone, and I couldn't stop thinking about what had happened there. Ignoring the fact I never got paid for helping Valuin, I found it difficult to imagine something so brutal could happen somewhere so...unassuming.

As I pondered those events, I took in my surroundings. The path beneath my feet was little more than a field of frozen dirt, with but a small smattering of cobblestones to confirm that it was indeed meant to be a road. The trees were bare, with twisted branches reaching out into the freezing wind. I had left the village at a poor time of year as it was now the middle of winter, and I could smell snow was not far away.

After another week of walking and very cold nights sleeping in thickets beside the road, I found I could travel less and less each day as the cold increased.

Thankfully, food wasn't an issue as the large hares of the region don't hibernate and propagate like crazy. I set up snares to capture my supper each evening, but the task required a patience that I didn’t have, so while I waited, I would spend my time chopping wood and keeping the fire going. In the end, I wound up eating four rabbits a day, as eating warm food kept my temperature up and made sleeping a lot easier. I quickly developed a routine; Wake, walk, eat, sleep, repeat.

There were times on that length of the journey where I wondered if I was ever going to make it. Bathing in near freezing waters was a nightmare and when the snow began to fall, even camping became harder. Overall, it wasn't an amazing experience, so when I eventually reached the town of Maidenstone, I figured I would stay there for a while. Maybe try and wait out the worst of the winter.

As I approached the town under the darkening sky, I could see at a glance that this vast settlement was easily twice the size of Greywall. I followed the road and eventually reached an imposing gate that sat along an equally impressive stone battlement. The evening guardsman, a stout man dressed in a fur lined coat over metal plated armour, beckoned me into his office in the lower level of the gatehouse.

By this point, I was half frozen from the snow that was reaching the ankles of my boots. I quickly moved inside the gatehouse and was hit in the face with a stifling heat from the hearth on the far wall.

The guard let me sit by the fireplace and warm up while he asked who I was and why I was visiting. I explained that I was merely passing through to make it to the capital and after looking me over, he asked-

Gate Guard: "Can I see your license?"

I was immediately confused, I had never had a license before and It had never occurred to me that I would need one for anything. He clearly saw my sheepish expression and his stern face turned to match my confusion.

Gate Guard: "Your mercenary license."

I was silent for a few seconds before replying with a puzzled:

Host: "But I'm not a mercenary."

His manner flashed once again from stern to incredulous to soft, he laughed into his notebook apologising.

Gate Guard: "Oh, I'm sorry about that! But you approached in the evening with gear strapped to your back."

He pointed to my sword leant against my rucksack by the chair.

Gate Guard: "There's no problem, I just got the wrong idea there."

The wrong idea? My confusion had reached whole new heights, and I looked around for my reflection. I caught myself mirrored in a nearby window pane holding back the outer darkness. 

My hair was longer, it now reached my chin, I had grown a short, messy beard. I was as tall and broad as always, but I was now much leaner now from the diet and walking. I suppose it would make sense for him to mistake me for a travelling sword-for-hire. He seemed especially surprised to learn that I was only 20.

We chatted for a little longer, but before I departed further inside, he told me to enjoy my stay but to keep out of trouble, and if I was staying for the winter, I should look for work, as the guard captain wouldn't stand for vagrants. After a few seconds of gathering my stuff, I was let out and allowed to pass through the thick iron gate into the town proper. 

Once inside, I began making my way straight toward the nearest inn for a drink and some real food. Walking through the town, I saw much of it was closing down for the evening. Candlelight poured through the windows down the street, illuminating the falling snowflakes with a warm yellow hue. Each step I took crunched on the snow beneath my feet, there was something undoubtedly pleasant about towns like Maidenstone, especially at that time of year.

As I had in the previous town, I booked myself into a cheap inn, had a much needed bath and settled in for the night. Resting in that warm room, on a soft cot. I can't begin to tell you how good it felt after weeks roughing it.

I understood why so few people choose to leave the comfort of their homes and travel. The world between the settlements is brutal and unforgiving. Being out there alone brought extra stress, knowing that any mistake was my own and that no one would have been there to help if I needed it.

Yet, despite it all, I loved all the new things I was seeing. I had to talk myself out of leaving Maidenstone the next day. A fanciful thought, but I knew that if I did, I likely wouldn't make it to the capital at all.

While thinking on my journey so far, I laid in bed and immediately fell asleep.

I woke up around midday to commotion from outside. Still groggy and aching, I leant against the window frame and peered out onto the street, and spied something I had never seen before.

Hundreds of people, moving in organised patterns past the building. I expected to see the same people coming round again, revealing they were all walking in circles, but no, these were all individual people who lived here and were merely going about their daily business. I had never seen so many people in one place, moving through packed streets in a complicated dance that I couldn't understand.

Gazing down, I wondered how anyone could avoid being swept up in the current. I was immediately struck with the knowledge the world was bigger and more complicated than I could have imagined. It was there that I saw Sprites for the first time, tiny humanoids standing no more than 4 feet tall, and a group of dwarves dressed in full steel plate.

I was tempted to step into the crowds and get swept up in it all, but I knew I would immediately be lost to its will and dragged away.

All I could do was stand there and watch the display: a streetside ballroom dance put on just for me.

[Music]

After my interest in the passers-by had calmed, I got dressed and prepared to leave. Storing my rucksack and sword under the bed, I left the inn. I thought a pleasant walk around town would do me some good and help me become acquainted with the area. Strolling through the streets, I was once again struck by the intricacy of the place; nearly every building was two stories tall, and made from the same light grey stone.

All the structures, however, were different, as though no planning had taken place before this town's construction, and that each builder was making it up as they went. I very quickly became overwhelmed by the many streets and chose to stay on the central roads. My mother was from an old farm outside of Maidenstone and would frequent here in her youth. She told us that you get used to it all and then it swiftly becomes less intimidating and more annoying the longer you stay.

After walking for a while, I stopped at a tea room across the road from a local park. As I watched from the comfort of the parlour with a cup of blackberry tea, I saw the falling snow blanket the world outside, and I knew that the weather would not let up for a while; in fact, it was likely to only get worse and I could be stuck here for months.

I knew I needed to find work. I had some money that I had saved up, but I would likely use all of it in the run up to leaving Maidenstone, unless I had a way to replenish it. Something simple, that paid an acceptable rate with no contracts or ties, likely manual labour of some kind. After I left the tearoom, I looked around for a notice board until I spotted one in the town square.

There were several jobs available. Most of which were offers for warehouse workers, sweepers in barbershops, assistants at the blacksmiths, and administrators for smaller businesses. I couldn't help but notice, dear listener, that there was a separate notice board on the back of the first. It was filled from top to bottom with job offers for "Licensed Private Military Contractors." Didn't take me long to figure out that they were referring to the mercenaries the guard mentioned.

Looking over the offers, I saw each one was a supplication for some dangerous deed needing completion, "Monsters in the Mountains, PMC wanted," "accompany a transport to the Shallowlands, PMC Wanted" and a considerable number of Bounty Hunting offers with targets of varying danger. What was amazing to me was the money on offer, as pulling in one bounty paid ten times a month's salary for any of these standard jobs. Pinned to the top corner of the board were several identical flyers suggesting that readers take the Private Military Exam and become a licensed contractor. All for a modest fee, no qualifications required.

I paid it no mind. I was not going to be a sword for hire. The incident back in Greywall was all the confirmation I needed about that line of work and I had already taken enough of a risk. My brothers parting words to me rang in my head "don't be a hero" and I didn't intend to be.

After a minute of perusing, I turned back to the first noticeboard and decided to follow up on a night shift job moving cargo in a warehouse. I went to see about the position and the manager on duty at the time accepted me on the spot.

Manager: “There are two rules: Do as you're told and don't break anything; payday is at the end of each week.”

Seemed simple enough, so I agreed to the terms and went to work that evening.

Break

Let's take a moment to see if we have any news or updates.

Ah, news has just come through that a new law has been passed in Elarial. Henceforth, looted treasure recovered during an adventure is subject to taxation. This apparently extends to friends made along the way.

Also, we have a job request, sent in to us here on a blood-soaked parchment. 

It reads:

"Caev nere grenmush, week monsta inside, sen weak advetnurer, big munny reward inside. Come alown."

Well, that is clearly a trap so someone go and sort that out please.

Right, that's that, back to the story.

Story Resume

I will be honest, I did not enjoy working in a warehouse. It was painfully repetitive and once they found out I was quite strong, I was suddenly carrying the heaviest crates by myself. But at least it wore me out enough so I could sleep soundly through the days, so I kept going. The money was terrible and they didn't pay me more for doing the work of four people, but I lived frugally, so at least I was no longer losing money while staying in the town. I was there for over a month, and found the crates I struggled with at the beginning were becoming much easier to lift by the end, so I felt like I got something extra out of it.

The snow was easing up and the last day of the month had arrived. Spring was now upon us, the roads between the settlements would be clearing, the days would be a bit warmer, and my time at the warehouse would end. That day, I would be paid my last wage and I could finally be on the move once again.

The warehouse was quiet. At this time of night the other workers were the types of people who didn't strike up loud conversation, which I certainly didn't mind. I'd been there a month and I didn't know anyone's name. Perfect. I wasn't interested in making friends or complicating my desire to move on. I was only passing through.

I strolled over to the delivery carriage and found a crate waiting. I dragged it over to me and inspected the parchment on the side and saw it needed to be taken to bay 7-A. Which was about 120 feet from where I was. I looked across the warehouse and the overhead crane was still occupied and would be for a few more minutes. I could either wait for the crane, or shift the box myself. That was the last of the cargo, and once it was sorted the 8 hour shift was over.

I waited for about 10 seconds before I found myself checking the box's contents marked on the same sheet of parchment. Looked to be a block of marble, weighing just shy of 300lbs. That wasn't too bad, so I decided to pull it off the side of the carriage and lift it up. The muscles in my arms strained a bit, but I could handle it.

Remember folks, lift with your knees, not your back.

I took one step carefully, and then another. The weight was awkward, but manageable. I began moving to the designated bay. I kept the distance in my head as I walked; 90 feet left, 60 feet left, 30 feet—

[SFX creaking metal]

A strange noise cut through the air. It was subtle, almost imperceptible, but I'd definitely heard it. Was it the box? No, the sound of the material wasn't right. It was a metal noise, not wood. I stopped in my tracks and listened as a chill washed over me, which was quickly replaced by suspicion.

I studied my surroundings but couldn't see anything strange in the warehouse. I realised that I mustn't look for the source, I had to use other senses, focus on the sound between sounds; hunt it like it's a hare in a thicket. I closed my eyes to shut out confusing visual stimuli and focused. I held my breath, quiet...quiet....

[SFX creaking metal]

Up. The sound was coming from the roof, I cast my gaze skyward to see a shadow move past a skylight, briefly illuminated by the lights in the warehouse.

Host: "What in the hells is that?"

I placed the box down on the floor and began walking in the direction I saw the shadow move. No one should be up there but that goes tenfold at this time of night. If it was a person, they were not moving like a person would move which was an ill omen.

Host: "Worst case scenario, that is some kind of monster, and if it is, I can't let it hurt anyone. I just need to see where it's going." 

I said under my breath, attempting to justify to myself why I wasn't ignoring it.

I kept my eyes trained upward while walking through the warehouse, slipping past crates and around other workers. I could see the shadow moving past skylights, it was heading towards the rear of the building.

The shadow moved quickly but quietly, I wasn't surprised no one else had seen it. I watched it stop near a window, to then writhe and claw at the air, as though it was struggling with something that I couldn't see. I was blocked from getting closer by a line of workers moving cargo.

But just as I managed to push through the crowd, I saw the shadow stumble backwards.

[SFX small explosion followed by glass smashing]

It tumbled through the skylight, a blur that fell 30 feet onto a wooden box, crushing it to splinters. I could see the creature now, no longer a formless shadow.

Bluish skin with a coating of fine short hairs, a batlike snout with protruding fangs coated in a thick saliva. Its large ears twitched as it slowly dragged itself to its clawed feet. It's hands, if you could call them, that had talons sharp enough to scratch the concrete floor in its effort to stand. It searched the room with eyes as black as night.

Val: "Everyone stand back, I've got this." 

Another voice but from above, strangely familiar this time. I looked up to and spied someone I hadn't actually expected to see again; Valuin. Gently gliding down from the roof as though the air itself took great care in delivering her to the ground.

The creature cocked its head to the side, clearly hearing Valuin descending upon it and, within a heartbeat, it bolted toward the exit.

Val: "Oh shit" 

Valuin saw the creature run and began frantically trying to swim through the air to get to the ground faster but whatever spell she had used was preventing her from speeding up.

I looked toward the beast as it leapt through the air toward some workers, claws extended. It would carve those men to pieces to get past them.

[SFX heartbeat]

Everything seemed to slow down as I spun on my heels and, without thinking, charged to intercept it. Workers scrambling in any direction away from it. I didn't have time to think up a plan, I was already closing on the leach with a speed that surprised even me. I bunched up, brought my right shoulder forward, and crashed into the beast. I felt its body crumple around mine as I made contact, viciously changing its direction.

I couldn't help but close my eyes from fear when I hit it, but after a mere moment, I heard something else.

[SFX bricks crumbling]

I opened my eyes again, and saw that I had hit the beast with enough force to throw it clear through the brick wall around 20 feet away. Valuin appeared beside me and looked through the hole in the wall as the light poured onto the creature's broken form. I had never hit anything that hard before, I didn't even know I could. It felt like an absurd fluke.

Val: "Well I think it's dead. Where in the hells did that display come from?"

Host: "I don't know. I think I just panicked"

Val: "Interesting way to panic. But I suppose I'm glad you did. Didn't think I'd see you again so soon, but I shouldn't be surprised you're stuck here; with how the weather turned after you left Greywall." 

Valuin left me standing there mouth agape, and stepped through the wall to inspect the body. 

Val: You really tenderised this thing. You're pretty strong, what rank are you?"

Host: "Rank? of what?"

Val: "Of mercenary."

She smirked incredulously, while picking up the creature's arm to check for a pulse.

Val: "I noticed back in Greywall that you were somewhat stunned by a dead guy, yet you throw beasts around like chew toys? Just feels like an odd juxtaposition in this line of work and it got me wondering. So, what rank are you? D, right?

Host: "I'm not a mercenary."

Valuin looked puzzled for a moment as she tried to figure out what the joke was, but soon realization dawned on her face.

Val: "You're not a PMC? Oh shit, that's wild. It's lucky we failed the cat job back in Greywall or we'd both be in trouble for getting you involved in merc work."

Host: "Speaking of. I assume that all this is a result of a job you're on. Why is it cat catching one month and then hunting leaches the next?"

Val: "Well, money is always an issue and I needed to push the envelope if I wanted to make some real coin. Say, if you're interested, you should take the exam and get your PMC license, become a merc and we could make some real money together. You seem reliable and I don't think it's just a coincidence that we keep bumping into each other."

I was stunned at the request. To begin regularly risking my life to make a few coins, I was doing fine as is.

Host: "Absolutely not. It's way too dangerous. Also, why does your voice sound different?"

Val: "Oh, that was fake. Humans are nicer when you speak with their accent, but I can't be expected to keep up a fake voice convincingly for weeks. Can I?"

Host: "Oh, fair enough."

The next thing I heard was raspy yelling from behind me. I turned to see the warehouse manager who had initially hired me, his moustache was frayed and the veins were protruding from his bald head.

Manager: “You broke down a wall? I thought I told you at the start not to break anything! This—" 

He gestured toward the hole in the wall.

"—counts as something. You're out of here and I'm docking your week's pay to cover this damage. Get gone!"

He quickly glanced at the beast corpse on the floor outside and appeared to think better of continuing to yell before slinking off as quickly as he arrived.

Host: "That rat bastard. He took a whole week's pay after I saved his workers' lives."

Val: "Well, If you were getting paid for this job like I am, a weeks wages here would seem like a pittance"

Host: "Perfect, then you can lend me some money to cover all this."

Val: "Aha, no. I, unfortunately, have my own debts to settle, but I genuinely think you'd pass the exam with that strength, and you don't seem slow-witted either. Merc work pays well. I think it's the best course of action at this point. Besides, if you're worried about danger, we can just go for relaxed missions. No hunting bounties or monsters."

I stared at the body on the ground and my mind began to wander back to the notice board from the town centre. Those jobs did pay well. It was all happening so fast. One moment I was stacking shelves, the next I had thrown a creature of the night through a brick wall, lost my week's pay, and been fired. Without that pay, I would have had to use my travel fund to cover my room at the inn. I had no one to rely on out there.

My hands were tied and I knew it.

I took my coat from inside the warehouse and walked out. I told Valuin that I would meet her at the noticeboard in the town square when she was done turning in the body.

It was a short stroll to the notice board. I remember hoping it would take longer so I could think more, or maybe build up some confidence for what was to come.

But before I knew it, I found myself standing back on the cold stone paving, illuminated by the light of the moon and the glow of a street lamp, back staring at the stack of flyers pinned at the top corner of the board.

I tore off a flyer and looked it over. After a few minutes, I heard footsteps approaching from behind.

Val: "All sorted. Job handed in, debt squared away, and almost no money left over. But I'm back in the black, so that's good.

I looked over my shoulder to see Val staring at the notice board.

Host: "This flyer says the exam costs 5 gold pieces, that's all my money. If I fail, I'm in trouble."

Val: "You won't fail. Not after what I just saw, no way. Besides, look at this one. A job escorting a transport to the Shallowlands. That's a main road for most of the journey and they'll provide food and a bedroll for us. That way we can really minimize expenditures until the job is done. Looks like a 20 gold pay-out for each of us."

Host: "That's a tidy sum which would definitely bankroll the rest of my journey. But if it's so easy, why is the job still available?"

Val: "Because it'll probably be hideously boring. We'll be stuck sitting on a carriage for about two weeks. There are a lot more exciting and better paying jobs for the more daring hero."

Host: "Okay, that makes sense. I do have one question, though. Why are they called mercenaries?"

Val: "That's just a colloquialism. We're officially called Independent Private Military Contractors. The time of heroes who work for free is over, capitalism made sure of that. Now you need a license if you want to do good. I suppose it works in preventing oversaturation and under qualification, but it still feels a little sad that we've been reduced to working for the highest bidder."

Private Military Contractors? Mercenaries? Adventurers was how I had always heard them  spoken of, like grand figures of yore, figures from a storybook. It somehow seemed a more polite way of referring to them; PMC's made them sound all business and no heroics. It was a sombre moment to realise that the days of champions of peace and justice were gone, and had been replaced by gig economy bullshit that fuelled unnecessary guild competition at the expense of the people.

I folded the flyer and placed it in my pocket while turning to Valuin.

Host:  "Alright, what do I need to do?"

Outro

We'll call it there for today. It's getting late and I think it's time to turn in.

Some of you may wish to know what I was thinking charging a beastie like that. In all honesty, I was not expecting my first encounter with a monster to be so sudden, so I wasn't really thinking at all. 

You can hope to get a bit of preparation time, a day or two to come to terms with the danger of your first dance with death but rarely do you get such an advantage in this line of work. When the time comes for you to face down your premiere monster, and that time WILL come, just trust your instincts and, if you've got some, fall back on your training. That will often see you through the worst of it and buy you time to think.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed today's session, be sure to tune in again next time to find out how my exam went.

Rest well, adventurers, and good hunting.