Calling All Adventurers: S2 E4 - One Minute

Intro & News

Calling all adventurers, I repeat, Calling all adventurers.

Some news, and you're not going to like it.

KING PARDONS NOBLE AFTER FATAL CARRIAGE ACCIDENT

Lord Fenrick, aged 26, has killed a cobbler while drunkenly driving his new carriage through the Hillhall market square. The courts confirm that the noble will face no punishment following a royal pardon, despite witnesses describing the act as deliberate and reckless. However, the official statement calls it "a momentary lapse of judgement unworthy of ruin."

The victim's family has received neither compensation nor apology. Guard postings have been sighted near the square where candles have been laid for the departed to "prevent disruption to the dignity of the kingdom."

Well, isn't that an interesting turn of events? I’ll tell you what, if anything happened to that noble, I expect some deeply upset people would be grateful for it. Maybe if that noble faced the other end of a similar scenario, the ones responsible for that might even get paid for it.

But would that be justice? Who can say? Do the courts decide what justice is for the people, or do the people decide what justice is, based on what benefits them collectively, and the courts should adhere to that?

An interesting concept to ponder while you rest tonight, but before that, let me tell you the next part of the story.

I hope you are sitting comfortably. Time to find out how I managed to survive this one.

Story Time

The rain pattered on the rooftop of the derelict house. The fire roared on as my new guest, Ainsley, stood in the doorway, water running off their wide-brimmed hat. They hadn't moved an inch, not so much as a breath. I suppose that was to be expected, given what they were.

The fireplace was packed tight. All the firewood and fabric I had on hand had been stuffed in, bringing the heat up to a near unbearable level. I attached the slim but hollow curtain rod to the end of the bellows as a makeshift nozzle, and secured it with a blood-soaked towel to try and keep it airtight. It appeared to be working, as I'd gotten the fireplace to an astonishing temperature.

A little note for you listeners, fireplaces can get too hot if you aren't careful, which may cause some structural problems.

Though, that was my intention. The cracking stone and mortar fireplace wouldn't hold out for much longer. I'd been burning away for nearly half an hour. I only needed to melt a few coins and I was running out of time. I placed 8 of the 9 coins onto a curved shard of the cast iron cooking pot, I wrapped my hands in rain drenched curtains to avoid burning and placed the shard inside the fire.

Ainsley: "A weapon forged from silver coins. Do you think that will work?"

Host: "I'm betting my life on it."

Ainsley: "Indeed."

Taking a larger curved shard of the cauldron, I set it down to collect some rainwater under a leak in the roof.

I took the dagger and used it to carve the shape of its own blade into the solid oak table. Vigorously, I scraped and chipped away until I had a mould I could pour the silver into.

I knew I didn't have enough to make a full blade, but I could certainly coat my steel dagger in enough silver to make it lethal to vampires.

Ainsley: "A wooden mould? Isn't that going to set fire to the entire table?"

Host: "If it was any other metal than silver, probably. But silver has a lower melting point, so a wooden mould should be fine."

From the corner of my eye, I saw Ainsley's brow furrow slightly before returning to relaxed. It seemed that they were starting to acknowledge I wasn't all talk. I actually had a plan, and that was something to think on.

I didn't have the time or the tools to do it all properly. I'd absolutely ruin the dagger in this process, but it would give me a tool that I'd only need one good stab with to bring the nightmare to an end. It just needed to survive one attack.

After trimming my last silver coin into silver shavings with the edge of the dagger, I placed the blade into the fire and the shavings into my coat pocket. I let the dagger heat up to assist with the bonding process. A few minutes later, I moved it to the mould and placed it in.

I moved the collected water to the table, then wrapped my hands in wet fabric and quickly removed the cast iron shard holding the now liquid silver from the fireplace.

Desperately, I tried not to dwell on the coming fight. Ainsley stayed quiet throughout, not likely from respect but rather curiosity.

I poured the silver over the heated dagger, lifting the handle by a millimetre to ensure the blade was coated on both sides, and I waited.

Looking through the window to the clocktower, I had only two minutes to midnight. My heart sank, my breathing shallowed, and my hands began to shake. I don't think I was far off a panic attack with the sheer dread I faced for the next 2 minutes.

I pulled the still burning dagger from the mould and placed it into the water to quench it.

[SFX hissing and bubbling]

Pulling the blade to my eye, I knew my brother would be disappointed at the shoddy workmanship but pleased by the ingenuity.

The tip wasn’t as sharp as I'd have liked but it was pointed enough. With the amount of pressure I'd be applying, it wouldn't make much difference.

I took the curtain pole from the fireplace and put it in the next room, propped up on the last good chair pointing toward the doorway.

I returned to the first room to face Ainsley, who was donning a broad smile. The firelight glinted off their pointed teeth and I could glimpse the blood red eyes from under their hat.

Now for the next part of the plan. I had to be very careful with my words, as they were about to form the binding contract I needed Ainsley to accept.

Host: "Ainsley, I invite you and you alone into this abode, not your companions. If you wanna get me, you're gonna have to do it yourself; I won't accept an ambush. I hereby formally challenge you to a Duel of Honour."

This was a ploy that Ainsley had no obligation to accept. All they had to do was wait one more minute and they'd be able to jump me together. However, a Duel of Honour would compel a response immediately. Best bit was, if they accepted, the winner would be able to request anything of the loser.

Ainsley was clearly an aristocrat based on the way they spoke, dressed, and held themselves. It would appeal to their traditional sensibilities to accept, and I expect they doubted to lose anyway.

My intense stare flicked away from Ainsley to the clocktower situated in the distance behind them.

90 seconds.

Ainsley half turned to their companions and shrugged. The companions thought for a moment before each shrugging back at them in approval.

Ainsley: "I hereby accept your challenge, but you've only got about one minute. After that, my friends will be joining us, as they are not bound by this duel."

Host: "Damn it."

Excellent.

I could see Ainsley's gears turning. They might have thought I'd made a mistake in my phrasing but it was actually a calculated gamble. They probably thought I'd prove little challenge for even one of them, thus accepting entry before the others, but ensuring they'd be able to join in soon anyway.

Whereas I believed I could handle one of them, but knew I couldn't handle them all. I knew the others would come in at midnight, but that bought me around one uninterrupted minute.

Just one minute.

I could make that work. This was framed to be an honourable duel, but fuck that. I couldn't pull any punches here, and I'd planned to use every nasty tactic, every dirty trick, every vicious play I could think of. I would win. Save for the silver dagger, I didn't need to worry about killing Ainsley. I knew they could handle anything I threw at them.

To be honest, I thought it may even be a little fun putting myself to the task and finding out how strong I really was. And so long as Ainsley kept underestimating me, I had a chance.

I donned my coat, wielded my sword in my right hand and placed my left in my pocket. Ainsley stepped through the door with a gleeful skip, as though the very act brought them pleasure.

They stopped about 10 feet from me.

My heart thumped in my chest so hard I almost couldn't hear anything else. I put on the mask.

Ainsley: "Honour to the best warrior—"

Host: "—may their victory be swift."

I glanced at the clock.

One minute.

I needed to dig deep once again. Find my innate skill and pull it out with everything I had.

Host: "Let's do this."

Ainsley leapt forward, I brought my sword up and released my grip, throwing it toward them.

The sword didn't make contact with anything. It passed through Ainsley's evaporating form.

They were turning to mist to close the distance.

Just as expected.

They were fast, but I was faster. As the sword left my right hand, my left was already leaving my coat pocket. I threw silver shavings in the direction of the smoke, Ainsley's direct approach putting them on a collision course.

I heard the burning as the shavings connected, forcing Ainsley out of their smoke form. The sword had already passed them and was moments from embedding into a door frame, but I wasn't counting on using the sword for this.

Dragging my left hand back from throwing the shavings, it acted as a windup as I pivoted my torso and threw every ounce of strength I had into the rotation of my waist and right arm.

[SFX sound of punch]

My knuckles made contact with Ainsley's rematerializing left cheek. I felt the muscles in my hand strain, my knuckles flatted against what felt like punching granite. Yet my power was undeniable, as I felt the vampire's neck snap from the swing.

The creature's limp body changed direction on a beat, and they sailed through the doorway to my left.

[SFX crunch and blood]

Ainsley had found the curtain rod.

I stepped forward. My right hand was useless now. Although it was hard to use, I still had my left.

Turning the corner, I saw Ainsley had been impaled by the curtain pole, clean through their torso. They fought to regain their footing.

I still had about 45 seconds.

Ainsley stumbled up, and gripped the pole to begin sliding it out of their chest.

I couldn't let them recover.

Drawing the dagger from the sheath, I dove toward the beast, but I miscalculated Ainsley's own combat experience. Rotating their torso, they used the purchase of the curtain pole's placement in their chest to swing it toward me. I felt it hit me in the recently cauterized arrow wound.

The pain was unbelievable, and combined with the surprising power of the swing, I was thrown to the side, crashing into a half destroyed bookshelf.

[SFX wood crash]

Everything went black as I lost consciousness. I couldn't let this be the end.

I gripped hold of my senses and forced myself back awake, but when my vision returned, I was already standing.

I must have gotten up while unconscious, but I didn't have the presence of mind to stop Ainsley pulling the pipe free from their bloodied form.

[SFX blood shlorp]

I looked down, the dagger wasn't in my hand anymore. A frenzied fear seeped into my bones as my eyes flicked around the room.

There! A glint in the corner. The dagger laid in a mess of old wood splinters.

I leapt for it, but Ainsley was already beside me.

They kicked, catching my stomach with their boot. The power of the kick sent me straight upward, and I felt my back crash into the ceiling. The pressure destroyed the half rotted chandelier hanging by a thread next to me.

Instinctively, I attempted to reach out to stabilise myself. I grabbed something but it didn't hold as I dropped back down toward the floor. My momentum ceased suddenly, as I was caught mid-descent. Ainsley had me, their long fingers digging into my arms, and their jaw widening to an unnatural degree as four sharp fangs protruded outward.

I was still holding something in my hand. Pulling it up, I saw it was a wax candle that I must have pulled from the chandelier.

I wheezed for air, as the vampire's jaws snapped shut. It took everything I had to throw my hand up, forcing the candle into their closing mouth.

The candle was crushed under the pressure, but the sensation was clearly unpleasant as Ainsley dropped me from their grasp. I clattered to the floor as they began clawing at their mouth to remove the wax from their teeth and throat.

I had maybe 30 seconds left, but losing consciousness prevented me from being sure.

Scrambling, I threw myself toward the dagger in the corner and snatched it up. I forced myself to my feet. Ainsley turned to face me.

I don't know if it was fury, but Ainsley had changed. Their clear porcelain skin had wrinkled into an unnatural snarl reminiscent of an angry dog, with dark veins around their black eyes.

I spun on my heel, and brought my right leg around in a wide arc. I would show this beast what a kick really was.

[SFX contact crash]

My shin hit the monster's side with such force I heard their ribs and spine crack from the impact.

They crashed into the armoire, shattering it to pieces and lodging part of their shoulder into the wooden wall behind it. That attack had dropped them to all fours.

My left shoulder screamed in agony as I forced myself to raise my arm and drive the dagger downward.

The blade landed in the centre of Ainsley's back, but their muscles tensed and I felt the blade stop in its tracks.

I dropped my right elbow onto the dagger's pommel, forcing it in a little further.

Host: "Yield and I spare you. Don't, and your friends won’t be able to save you."

I knew what Ainsley was thinking.

Host: "You might try to hold on for 20 more seconds for midnight. But I promise you, if you don't yield right now, you won't live another five."

I adjusted my weight and leant on the blade. If Ainsley dropped the tension in their back at all, even for a second, it would be over for them.

Host: "So be it."

I raised my right elbow again, and brought it down like a warhammer.

[Host yell, cut off]

Ainsley: "I yield! I yield"

[SFX clock strikes midnight]

Ainsley: "It's over. I yield."

I felt Ainsley relax slightly, which gave me cause to believe they were sincere. Tentatively, I removed the blade from their back and stood up.

Host: "I win. On your honour, you must concede to my three requests."

Ainsley slowly stood up and dusted themselves off. I watched the cuts on their skin disappear and return to a perfect porcelain sheen. And clearly a broken spine wasn't much of a hindrance to something like a vampire. Good to know.

Ainsley: "So be it."

Host: "There are things I want to know."

Ainsley: "Ask away."

I had only two opportunities to ask questions. I had to save my last request. I needed to be careful and get as much information from each question or demand as possible.

Host: "Tell me everything you can about Helar's operations."

Ainsley's eyebrows raised in the first clearly visible expression I'd seen them make since they got there.

Ainsley: "I asked about him a bit a few months ago but he's the elusive sort. Helar, Ulysees Helar that is, is a powerful broker operating out of Sistia. Rumour has it he's a science professor turned medical magnate; made a fortune in private clinics catering exclusively to the noble elite. After that he diversified his portfolio into high-end cosmetics, pharmaceuticals, and a private security company named Blackwood. He's extremely influential in the capital's high society, trading favours and information with its aristocratic populace."

Ulysees Helar. Finally a full name. I'd relay it to Val as soon as we met back up, a meeting for which I was already late.

Host: "If Helar had you here working with COBALT. Where are they operating?"

Ainsley: "As I said, we're not really working with COBALT. Our goals merely aligned for a time. We organised with them to get to you, but Helar himself didn't sanction that. That said, I do know that COBALT operate out of an old printing shop in The Merchant's District."

Okay, that was some actionable information. I was pleased I didn't die and got something out of the ordeal.

Ainsley: "And for your final request?"

Host: "With respect, get the hell out of my sight and don't let our paths cross again. I don't want to so much as hear your name or I will find you. I will hunt you to wherever it is you hide from the light, and I promise I won't need an invitation."

A genuine grin stretched across Ainsley's countenance. They tipped their hat, spun on their heels and began walking out the room before stopping briefly in the front doorway. Half turning their head, they spoke up over the rain.

Ainsley: "This last piece of advice I give freely. Try and deny it all you like, but you've got the makings of a killer. If you are set on continuing down this path, you'll need to get over your aversion to it. You may have been a big fish wherever you come from but you're in the ocean now. There's a lot of things out here that won't hesitate like you did tonight."

Host: "I'll make it fine without shedding unnecessary blood."

Ainsley: "You'll be dead in a week. However, heed my words and you're going to go far, child."

They stepped into the rain and evaporated into the darkness before I could respond.

I hit the floor the second I was alone, all strained muscle and pained breaths.

Host: "Shhhhit, that hurts!"

In the heat of the moment, the pain doesn't really sink in. It took all I had not to collapse during the questions at the end. Ainsley had hit me twice in the freshly sealed arrow wound. My left shoulder throbbed so hard I could feel it in my heart. I couldn't stop my right hand from shaking. Split knuckles dripped blood, and I struggled to form a fist with it.

Punching things is bad for the hands, I needed to stop doing it.

With shaky grip, I pulled off my mask and breathed deeply in a bid to steady myself, but I needed a moment.

Ainsley could give all the advice they like, but I knew in my heart that I was about to do it. If my elbow had made contact with that knife before those words had left their lips, it would have been the end of our little game.

Still, they had sauntered out of there like nothing had happened. If they'd been mortal, they'd have been dead four times over by the end. I was sure I'd broken their neck, spine, and ribs. I'd impaled them with a pipe, stabbed them in the back and, save for ruined clothes, they looked no worse off.

In that moment, I'd have given nearly anything for regenerative powers.

I gave myself 60 seconds to rest but couldn't allow any more time to pass. I had somewhere to be.

Picking myself back up, I adjusted my gear, pulled the sword free from the doorframe and left for the clocktower. Ainsley and their retinue could have still been nearby but I didn't sense anyone watching me. That was the first moment all day where I had felt some semblance of calm.

The deluge from on-high wasn’t letting up. I crept through rain soaked streets, quickly, with my head down. I stuck to back alleys and didn't encounter any COBALT or other creatures of the night.

After 5 minutes of walking, I finally approached the clocktower.

12:20.

Val was nowhere to be seen. Crossing the courtyard quickly, I figured I should keep out of sight so I tried the door at the clocktower's base.

Unlocked.

I moved inside and was greeted by a narrow square staircase leading up.

Host: "Val?"

Val: "There you are! I've been worried sick."

I heard Val before I saw her face peeking out over the top floor banister. Seeing her let me relax a little, and I climbed the stairs, passing lengthy falling weights that hung down the tower's newel.

At the top, there was a mid-sized open stone-walled room. In each of the four walls large clockfaces were inset, brightly lit by outward facing gas lamps.

In the centre of the room was the clock's inner mechanism. A tall, skinny contraption composed of multiple geartrains interconnected by long steel rods attached to the inner faces. This mechanism was connected to the weights in the newel through a cutout in the wooden floorboards.

Val had dropped our bags next to two crates.

Val: "You're injured again."

Host: "Yeah. Fell through a roof and dislocated my arm, got shot with an arrow, fought a vampire. All in all, I'm looking pretty good."

Val: "A vampire? Did you kill it?"

Host: "Sorry to disappoint but no. Instead, I beat them in a duel for information."

Val: "You probably should have killed them anyway."

Host: "Well, that would have broken the terms of the duel and then the other three vampires may not have been so kind in retreating."

Val: "Well, that's a different story. What did you learn?"

I started rummaging through my rucksack for the health potion.

Host: "Ulysees Helar is a broker in the capital. Going by what I was told and what we already know, he's influential, wealthy, and ruthless. Big mover and shaker with those at the top. I don't know how we are supposed to go up against that."

Val: "By taking things one step at a time. We can’t focus on Helar right now as we've already got enough on our plate. Let's get out of this situation before we get into the next."

I nodded and necked the entire rest of the potion. The pain immediately eased. I watched the skin on my fingers knit back together and felt my body lighten.

I noticed Val watch me drink with an expression of mild concern, but she appeared to think better than rapping my knuckles, as we had much bigger issues. The thing about Bloodrot is that you need to live long enough to get it, so that took precedence.

Host: "Did you learn anything about COBALT?"

Val pulled out her leatherbound notebook and flipped it open to an earmarked page filled with writing.

Val: "In a longer-than-average summary. As you know, the most recent war between The Kingdom of Elarial, The Irmidian Federation, or Irmidian Empire as it was known at the time, and The Dev'aas Dominion, ended nearly 8 years ago. The conflict was originally exclusively between the Dominion and the Empire, and Elarial merely sat between them. That changed when this continent became the mutually agreed location for the ensuing land war. The two superpowers thought they could bully Elarial into providing a proxy battlefield. Safe to say it didn't go well."

Host: "Because Elarial joined the war and beat them both."

Val: "With a shocking display of military prowess and the benefit of the home advantage, yes. Once the two aggressors had been broken, many of the Elarian soldiers who had lost friends and family to them waited for the counteroffensive. For Elarial to wipe those countries off the map, but it never happened. Elarial set peace terms instead."

Host: "Why didn't Elarial finish them off?"

Val: "It was a strategic decision. The Kingdom withdrew from foreign lands, consolidated power and retained strong control over preexisting domestic territories. Instead of outright punishing the Dominion and the Empire, Elarial forced them into favourable trade agreements in place of traditional reparations. They recuperated the losses after the war but didn't push harder than they needed to."

Host: "And the Elarian soldiers who fought in that felt betrayed."

Val: "Precisely. Many soldiers attempted to reintegrate, others fled to far corners of the map in search of peace, while another contingent stationed here, formed COBALT in response. The way they see it, all their friends died just so the rich could benefit from trade agreements. They painted their armour a deeper shade of blue than the national colour and started terrorising the very country they had once sworn to protect, the country they believed had betrayed them more cruelly than any foreign power could. That said, it's been eight years and they've not really accomplished much of merit. Don't get me wrong, they started off strong with a few assassinations and a couple of explosions, but have since devolved into aimless miscreants."

Host: "Okay, but what has that got to do with Colinsworth Mulbrand?"

Val: "Well, COBALT have been active for 7 years with no one funding them, but someone clearly is. Remember Councilman Lockridge?"

Host: "The guy Harrington corresponded with?"

Val: "Yes. In an interview with the Solumm Herald, he claimed he'd follow up on any lead sent to him regarding COBALT or their backer. He asserted that COBALT must be funded by someone of substantial wealth in order to still be a functioning faction."

Host: "Helar."

Val: "It's very possible. Harrington stated that his brother was a mathematical genius with a knack for puzzle solving. He's a well-educated shut-in from a minor noble house. If you ever needed someone capable enough to cook your books, that's the kind of guy I'd want. COBALT are still active, but their more recent activities have been disparate attacks on nobles, politicians, and anyone who looks at them sideways."

Host: "Nobles, politicians, and seemingly random people who may or may not have been set upon by COBALT at Helar's request. Maybe to further some other goal of his or a client. He is a power broker after all."

Val: "I thought it could be any local powerful noble, but this vampire bringing Helar into the conversation near enough confirms that it's actually him."

Host: "This fucking guy."

Val: "Indeed. Now we've just got to locate COBALT HQ and get them to leave us be, and see if they know anything about Colinsworth."

Host: "Oh, I think I know. The vampire said they operated out of an old print shop in the Merchant's District."

Val: "And you believe them?"

Host: "I'm inclined to, yes."

Val: "Okay, it's our best lead in any case. Take 10 minutes and we'll head out."

Host: "Nah, let's go now. If I start to relax, it'll be harder to get back up. I gotta keep momentum. Besides, every second counts, right? It could be all the difference for Colinsworth."

Val: "A fair point. Let's go!"

Outro

I know what you're thinking. Insane, right? You don't have to tell me that.

Fist fighting a vampire was one of the dumbest things I'd ever done until that point. But it wasn't too hard and I could do it again, easy as pie now. That's right, Ainsley. I called you out. I know you listen to these!

That said, I suppose there's something I must confess. Many listeners might believe that I had immeasurable mental fortitude. That my will to survive, my belief in success rings unrealistic for a simple farm boy.

In truth, I'm a fucking idiot. Throughout so much of it, I'd have a flicker of doubt regarding my survival. But on the whole, dying didn't occur to me as a real possibility.

Sure, it would hit me for a moment before or in the afterglow. But I was riding a high of successes, one after another. We might not have always gotten the bad guy, but we'd survive. And we'd keep surviving, and that feeling of invincibility? Safe to say it's worse than ever now.

Be wary of that feeling, listeners. It poses a greater danger to you than many external threats.

Mind thy humours, lest they lead thee to ruin.

Rest well, adventurers, and good hunting.

Credits

Calling All Adventurers is a production of The Tower Array, written and directed by Gray Smith.

The Host is played by Gray Smith.

Valuin Emmaris is played by Ivy Smith.

Ainsley is played by Ian Kay.

You can find out more about the show at thetowerarray.com